The girls did earn Jr. Park Ranger badges (I think we are up to five now) and we had a fantastic lunch at a local Latin restaurant where Joel discovered he loves guacamole. I'm always excited when he tries something new, but now Kevin and I are faced with a new First World Problem: one more person to share the guac with...
ME: "Oh no! WaaaaaahaaaaAHAHHAHAHHAAA!"
KEVIN: (really calmly from back seat) "What?"
ME: "DOG DOG DOG DOGDOGDOGDOOOOGGGGG! GET OUTTA THE ROAD!"
KEVIN: "Honk at it."
ME: "WHERE'S THE HORN ON THIS THING?????" (slowly fading to left lane because the USS Gigantic doesn't do anything faster than it wants to. Really. I change lanes at the speed of continental drift, except I use a turn signal. Take that, San Andreas Fault!)
DOG: *keeps walking as we fly by, shows as much emotion as your average iguana*
ME: "That was awful."
JOEL: "There's more!"
There were indeed three other dogs. It was like a bad dream, the one where I see one spider then suddenly there are more everywhere I turn. But the other dogs were smarter. They stayed in the median. My adrenaline subsided somewhere around Malvern, Arkansas. Things got pleasantly boring. I counted FedEx trucks (23). Kevin took over at the truck stop just east of the Texas border and we made it to Lake Bob Sandlin State Park, via construction foreman escort through a closed road.